Scaling the Paranormal

Sometimes, when I get too happy, I like to bring myself back down a bit with a little high weirdness. There's something about Rigorous Intuition that's uniquely depressing, which is why—for me at least—it's such a great antidote to a bright and sunny day. But during a recent visit, it suddenly occurred to me that something just isn't right, and it doesn't have anything to do with the site. What's bothering me is the same thing that's bothering certain dinosaur researchers. It's the scaling.

After reading about the dinosaur paradox the other day, I began thinking about the relative sizes of things on this planet, or more to the point of this monologue, the relative sizes of things not of this world. The thing is, when it comes to phantasms, little green men, and the incomprehensible creatures that inhabit past and present folklore, the apparitions always seem to be scaled to fit within our physical reality. You don't run across many accounts of otherworldly beings the size of, say, a skyscraper. I don't recall, either, anyone reporting gigantic semitransparent feet wreaking havoc on people's lives. Sometimes the phenomena are abnormally small, but are they ever impossibly large? I don't mean the mothership hovering over downtown Los Angeles. Motherships, after all, are supposed to be big. Motherships fit the scale.

But where is it written that ghosts, extraterrestrials, and other paranormal entities have to be scaled to match the lifeforms who witness them? Where is the ghostly eyeball so immense that it obscures the sky? Where's the apparition that dwarfs our galaxy? Considering their legendary disregard for the physical laws that frame our mortal realm, isn't it odd that paranormal phenomena should be scaled as if their physical existence depends on it?


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