Realizing the Event Horizon

Don't judge a hole by its color. Historically, the sight of a crow heckling a large hawk causes me to avert my eyes. The outcome is predictable, severe, and does little to improve my already cynical worldview. This morning's episode, however, was different in one very important way: I had a realization. This is how I was able to connect the dots.

I saw that the connectivity of dots is hampered by their straightforward appearance, leading to the realization that coaxing them out of their hide-in-plain-sight surroundings and onto a sheet of carbon paper is the best way to observe their habits. This led to the conviction that too many dots spoil the graph, but it didn't matter because I had already arrived at my realization, which isn't the sort of thing that needs to be done twice.

If asked, I would simply indicate that the murder of crows is no longer my responsibility. If asked again, I would simply indicate that, yes, they do grow on trees. The third time, I would simply point to the nearest black hole, which is exactly like a hawk, only without the feathers. Superior encephalization quotient or not, crows should know that by now.

 

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